If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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