Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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