first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
false alarm. still invincible.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
