She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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