Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
