WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize