I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
