I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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