guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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