I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
