i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
