So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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