all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
