Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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