i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize