he shaved USA in his pubs
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
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