I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
