let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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