y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
did you just send me my own nude
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
