I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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