she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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