im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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