dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
