We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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