I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
