New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
