I only kidnapped one of them. chill
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
