I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
