barbara walters just said penis...
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
