How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
