my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
