You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize