dude i'm inner monologue high
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
