And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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