This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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