'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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