sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize