Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
