If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
