Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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