i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
