I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
