He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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