I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
