Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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