What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
