It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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