dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
