Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
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