Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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