She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
